Because of God's great love.

2 Timothy 4:7-8 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day.”  Remembering a dear friend who danced her way into Heaven two years ago today.  She taught me about the kind of person that I wanted to be. I am a better person for having known her.  I am so thankful to God for the gift of her friendship. I am forever changed because of her friendship and influence on my life.   

My life verses come from Lamentations 3:21-23, 32-33 “Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to anyone.”  In the past 2 years I have experienced God’s love, grace and healing in so many ways.  It has been a journey, that is for sure.  Yet, it has been a journey, that I would never change.  

My heart and body have known deep pain… But today I testify that God has been very faithful.  He has proven his love over and over again, to someone who at times doubted God and His goodness.  He has brought healing to places in my life that at times when I lost hope, I truly felt these places would never heal. I felt hopeless about finding relief from the excruciating pain in my back.  For the last 8 months I have experienced such a reduction in pain, that I can once again function in my day to day activities.  God has healed a grieving heart that questioned if I would ever want to “go deep” in my friendships and relationships again.  God taught me to see people and situations through his eyes. His compassions never failed!  Great is His faithfulness!  His love never failed! God is so very good!  I am a better person today, I am closer to God today, My love for him has grown to a depth I never knew existed because of the journey that he has walked with me on and many times carried me through.  I am trying to find words for something that my heart cannot express and I think that is ok….. 

I am going to let this song speak for me today. 

Looking Back. Moving Forward.

This past week I have “re-lived” memories from a year ago.  This year, I find it interesting that last week was Holy week.  April 18-25, 2010 seemed to be a very holy week, too, as I spent that week in the hospital with a friend who was battling cancer.  There were many times when God was so clearly present in her hospital room. My heart still hurts when I think about her and the memories that we shared.  Many of the biggest memories we shared, we never really got to talk about them again here on earth. I know that someday we will be able to do that.  What a blessing those memories are today.  

A scripture that God gave to her and I in that last week was 2 Timothy 4:7-8 "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing."   I imagine what those first moments in Heaven were like.  I imagine how it must have taken her breath away to see and experience all of it. I imagine how it felt when God put his arms around her as He welcomed her home.  I imagine her joy in receiving a new healthy, pain free body.  I imagine what she looks like with her crown.  

In November 2010, I was able to share the story of Deanna and my friendship with a group of women. The beauty of the honesty, love and openness that Deanna and I shared in our friendship.  The laughter, the tears (and sometimes we cried and laughed at the same time). God used her and I in each others lives to make both of us better people.  God used a community of believers – “Jesus lovers” - to impact her life and mine to make each of us better people.   God used each one in that community of friends to draw each other closer to Him.  

When I was finished talking to these women about this story, a group of friends were praying for me and one of them said “God, you grew her (Nancy) up this year.”  And that phrase has gone around and around in my head.  It is really so true.  God opened up a deeper place within me that is a place where God and I often “go”.  A place that I didn’t know existed until this experience.  And it's not really something that I can put into words today.  But I know that God taught me things I would have never known about Him, about loving from the heart, about His grace, about serving others, about His love, about trusting Him enough to let go....had it not been for this experience with Deanna. 

I still miss Deanna today.  However, it's a different kind of "miss you" feeling.  I would never wish for her back, when I think of the pain that she was in.  Life does go on.  It has to.  We can not live our lives holding on to the past and expect to move forward.  That's the difference in the how I miss her today.  It is not in a grieving type way that I miss her.  I miss her.  I miss talking to her, I miss seeing her, I miss hearing her laugh (usually her laughter was at me about something I had done or said)  :)   I am ok.  I know that she is ok.  And I WILL see her some day and that is what I hold on to as I look forward to that day. 

The Peace God Provides

John 14:27


Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.


We moved to another house in July, still in our same town, just a different house. When we bought this house, we felt very strongly that God was leading us to this house, for the purpose of giving people who needed “shelter” and place to stay. The economy is still not the best in our area and the housing market has been in “park” for about 6 months now, so we currently own 2 houses. Our kids have long begged for a home at “the lakes” (about an hour from us) and we have always told them that ‘no, we can’t afford 2 houses”. Now we own 2 houses so they are wondering why we have said we can’t and now we do. Our answer? Just because we do, doesn’t mean we can. *smile*


Throughout the past few months I have had my doubts, times of fear, times when I questioned whether we did the right thing, times of an absence of peace in my life. Then Ju Chan arrived in the US and needed a home and without question we knew he was supposed to live with us. We did not want to receive anything financially for allowing Ju Chan to live with us, however, his father insisted and wired money to us for Ju Chan’s care. God provided. Last week a man that we attended college with us contacted us, he needs a place to rent in our town during the week, would we rent our home to him? God provided.  Two days ago I began a new job.  This one is fewer hours and more pay.  God provided.  We made the first double house payment last week and I am truly stand amazed at how God is providing for us in tangible ways. Why am I so amazed? God’s deepest desire is to love and care for his children. God’s deepest desire is to deepen my relationship with him.


After a few “quiet” weeks with only one showing, we have had 3 showings in the past two days. As I opened the house yesterday for the realtors, I realized I have complete peace right now with this situation. God knows. He knows my needs. He knows the plan. He does not promise an absence of hardship in our lives, He promises that HE will never be absent.

More Than Conquerors

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?” -- Romans 8:35


It is interesting to me that this verse starts out with “who” and ends with several forms of “what”. All of the things listed are not things that would come from God, but we know that they are a result of sin in the world. And I believe that the “who” here is satan.

Think with me about Job 1 and 2 – where a conversation occurs between God and satan. Job is not even aware of this conversation, but he definitely feels the impact of this conversation. He suffered tremendous loss! He suffered tremendous pain. He experienced things that went against God’s character and did not fit with what he knew to be God’s character. Job came to a crisis of faith and belief in God. Through it all, Job is “put to the test” and out of the ashes he rises. The book of Job tells us that Job never “charged God with wrongdoing”.

I wonder today how many times conversations go on between God and satan, where I am the center of the conversation? I may never know, however, I have the “privilege” of having read Job 1, to know that this conversation between God and satan did occur. Job did not have that. In the book of Romans, chapter 8, Paul uses powerful words to answer his own question about “who can separate us from the love of Christ?” Pauls says: “NO! In all things we are MORE than conquerors!” “For I am convinced…” “Nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God”

If, today you find yourself in the midst of what seems like a “train wreck” in your life. If you are dealing with things that are causing you to question all that you know to believe and understand about God and his character… take comfort and be encouraged by these verses from Romans 8. The temporary things of this life will not separate you from the Creator of all things. God is love and He loves you so much more than you can imagine. And you never know - but there may very well have been a conversation about you. Lean into God’s loving arms. Let him carry you through this time in your life and use the strength he gives to help you rise above the “train wreck” and be more than a conqueror!